I find it so ironic how often the one thing we refuse to do for fear of the backlashes one will get tend to have opposite results.

I never figured my wife would stumble upon the article I wrote (Back to the beginning of a possible unhappy ending) about how we met and our 11 years together after that. As many times as I had tried in the past to get her to come to JU, she picked that one day to come on to JU. When I noticed she was reading it, I figured this was it, the end was here and our relationship was come to a screeching halt. I was expecting attitude, anger, insults and maybe even an all out argument considering I had poored out my feeling in total honesty. She had no clue about many of the things I had wrote and was shocked to read it all.

Oddly enough, after reading the article and also finding her way to the previous article (Oh how I hate to feel envy) that spawned the second one, I have seen an improvement in her attitude towards our relationship. I have to say that I too find myself rethinking my attitude towards the relationship. I find myself looking for ways to make up for my insensitive doubts I had all these years. Everything from making sure I dance at parties with her more often (I don't really dance much cause I am a bit shy about it), going to places with her I don't usually go to (I went to church with her this past Sunday, she had been asking me to go for a long time now although this was her second time there), and I have even been cooking most of the time lately (I do like cooking though from time to time< I think I cook better than her but don't tell her I said that, LOL).

All in all, she seems much more determined now to make this work than ever before. She is now constantly questioning everything (rather than accepting it and not caring) and is actaully looking for ways to fix things rather than say "oh well, if it doesn't work". She even comes to the site once in a while to read what I post. She does not always like what I write but I told her I am simply being honest and it just shows how little she knows me. It only makes her more curious about me now. Talk about improvements, feels really good to be paid attention to, even if it's for something that she didn't like. The way I se it, would you rather me be honest about how I feel and think or would you rather I sugar coat everything to not offend others? And that little feeling we like to call "being in love" may not be so far out of our reach as I thought I could be.

So remember, sometimes it's best to be honest and hope for the best than keeping things to yourself and creating a situation that will most likely lead to the worst. Just my 2 cents.