Groups of people take on characteristics similar to individuals. While specific people within the group all deviate in certain respects, the group itself tends to take on an identifiable, individual character. (For example, think of "national characters:" the French are snobs, the Germans are militaristic and have no sense of humor, et cetera.) One way to classify people (and thus groups which have taken on a particular character) is by the permanence of their reaction.

* Some people have to have something proven to them every time
* Some people make up their mind and never change the opinion
* Some people make up their mind but can change their opinion if given a lot of contrary evidence.

(For the sake of simplification since this is just a comment, I'll leave it at those three categories.)

As a whole, JU tends toward the second of those. In general, it makes its mind up quickly and holds to it. (Yes, there are always exceptions, but if you want to track the behavior the vast majority of the time, that's the JU zeitgeist as far as that goes.)




I'd disagree with that. If you bring up "freedom of speech," what you are most likely to get is, "Freedom of speech only applies to the government. There is no right to freedom of speech here or in any other private setting!" That's the main current, the JU zeitgeist (again).

Nope, you won't find a lot of defending of freedom of speech on this site. (And while the JU zeitgeist is technically correct, I have a big problem with it.)




You lump "witty replies" with childish arguments, insults, and name calling? Okay, if you insist.

I am not sure I agree with that completely. (Although, you did say "tends")

It seems like some of the most beloved of JU posters have a rough start, a big blow out, and then when everyone comes to their senses, that person is welcomed with open arms. I have seen that scenario play out again and again.

Charles: You say you don't care, but posting an entire article on this smacks of care, haha.

My advice for you:

A) Stop being a douche.

or

Continue being a douche and stop caring whether you are in the "in crowd" or not.

It's like high school. The more you care what other people think, the more lame you seem.

 

I like this, makes perfect sense.

 

 

Just in case, i wasnt necessarily speaking of the site but the people in it. They decry how they have the write to speak to their hearts content yet love taking that same ability away from those they dont like or disagree with.

 

 

Well witty only when being insulting.

 

I wrote the article because I wanted to point out what I see as respect on JU, not by the admins or owners, but the people who make the community. I really don't care anymore how some here feel about me. I would rather we got along and not thought of each other in insulting manners but I can not change other peoples minds so I adapt.

 

 

Please explain how I am being a douche. Since the first time we crossed words you have had nothing but dislike towards me and I have never understood why. If we gonna judge people within the first minute of getting to know them then maybe you should stop being a douche as well. Not once have you ever said anything remotely nice to me as if I did something very terrible to you.

 

 

As I said, I could care less if I am part of the "in crowd" or not. I did want that when i first came here but that's not important anymore. I just like being on JU and reading peoples opinions and posting my own. BTW, most here are adults, some with children. This is not high school anymore but if that is how you see it then I can understand all the childish attitudes around here. Maybe some here need to grow up a little.

Give me specifics. Explain what is it about me that brings such dislike. I can't help but being curious. There's nothing worse to me than not knowing something I am very curious to know. Dont be shy, spill the beans. Tell little ol me why I annoy you. Use this article to let it all out.

How do I find you a douche? Let me count the ways...

Seriously, though, Charles, I don't know how to quantify it. Sometimes you're ok, sometimes you bug the hell out of me.

I would have to think about it quite deeply to give you a detailed accounting. Which I might do later since I am awake and everyone else in my house is asleep. Let me think on it.

LOL, Asaxy, you're too nice.

Humanity doesn't enter into it for me. Haha. I like most of the JU regs. Some I adore completely. There are a few strays here and there that it pains me to even considering being nice to because their personalities are so annoying (and yes, I have a VERY annoying personality, haha, I can't help some people are nice to me! I could be Charles/Erathoniel/Lucas but for the grace of the JU community's good will!).

I'm not your biggest fan, but so far as I can recall I think it's based on the length of your paragraphs rather than anything else, so that's hardly set in stone. In this article your usage of 'I' is a bit offputting, but nothing serious. Of course, I'm a bit fickle when it comes to internet people. Consistency in reaction is for the dead and the dead at heart.

In response to your actual article, I don't think there is some JU force of nature which dictates how things work. When I joined the site years ago I called LW (even then a very popular JUer) a Klansman (klanswoman?) if I remember correctly. I think we get along fairly well now, but I don't think anyone would have said we were friendly back then. Quite the opposite. It took a long time before I could see things from her perspective and gain a better understanding of where she stood and what shapes her, and I imagine it was much the same for her.

The key to getting on well in JU, so far as I can tell, is to never take it personally and never take it seriously. If someone cracks the shits with you, deal with it and move on. Don't write a post bemoaning your isolation. Laugh it off, or, if you're particularly good, figure out what's accurate and whether it's worth changing your style and then laugh it off.

At various stages I've swapped questions about relative intelligence and insults with Moderateman, Bakerstreet, Draginol, LW and nearly everyone else who's been influential about one thing or another. I think most of us here secretly like a bit of a barney every once in a while. The key to not being considered a prat by most is just to let it go. When you feel too hard about a subject, let it go. When you really start to take the back and forth personally, let it go. Be the leaf in the wind, or Jesus, or whatever your religion demands.

That's the key to JU love. You're not going to like everyone, but if you're reasonable, chances are you'll find someone or other you like.

This is something you really should hear Charles.  Cut your paragraphs down in size.  Seriously.  Yeah I know if the topic sentence covers the info, it should technically be in the same paragraph...but I think breaking that rule to save our eyes will carry you a long way.

I personally don't have a problem with you, but do cringe when you talk about how you're not scared of LW.

Let it go.  LW doesn't seem to have a hard on for ya Charles.  But every time you mention her name, you should know by now, she's not gonna just ignore it. 

When I first came to JU, I was a little intimidated by the "off" JU relationships.  Meaning, it seemed at first glance as if most of the people here knew each other in real life.  It was like crashing a party.

So I found someone whose writing style "clicked" with me and who seemed ok about accepting the new guy and spent a lot of time on her blog getting a real feel for the place.  I was right.  She did accept new people on her blog, heck even WELCOMES them.     

That may not work for everyone, but since I've never lived anywhere for more than 5 years in my life, I've been the new gal a lot and find taking bite size pieces is better than just jumping into the middle of people and saying "HERE I AM! LUCKY YOU!  OH AND HERE IS MY OPINION!  WOOT."  (Cuz I've done that too and like you wondered...WHAT?  What happened?"  (Of course that was many many years ago.)

Don't know what to tell you except..JUST BLOG.  Take the focus off the relationships on here and just write.  You may find you get a following.

 

 

Wow, I find it hard to believe I have been that bad that you need time to think about the things I've done to you. You people are much harsher than I first thought.



Thank you, my point exactly.



Yes, she is very nice (kinda wonder why you make it seem that this is a bad thing) but she is also correct.

Thanks for your reply cacto. I agree I have issues with posting short replies. I have mentioned it many times before. I can't help but using so many words to make a point. I guess my chatterbox personality extends to my typing. I talk a lot, it's just who I am. I never figured such a thing would make people disgusted to see my name. Annoying is one thing, some here are as annoying as I am and they even admit it, but to the point of constant insults almost every time I post something?

I know we have not always seen eye to eye either. We have different opinions about many things, but I have never felt the need to insult you at ever turn. I have my opinions and you have yours. I live in the US and as far as I'm concerned you have that right and I won't take it from you. Sure, if I get insulted in some way then I'll fire back. But besides the old cook Gene, I don't insult people right off the back, he earned it after a while. And even then I was nice to him from time to time.

I agree and do try to keep it short. Not always easy I guess. I just dont think that is cause for dislike though.



Thank you for your reply Tova. Here's the funny thing. I don't focus on LW. It's she who has the tendency if nit-picking what I say and make fun of it in some insulting way. The few times I have attacked LW was because she was asking for it literally. Her normal attacks like F you and screw you usually accompany her comments. She can never argue without insulting, even during a debate of a topic. Why the woman is so sour is beyond me but I see many here are already use to her. Still she can be very kind to many here yet she constantly treats me like trash, so, I decided to give some back to her.

I don't claim to be an expect at dealing with LW, as some here have tried to make a deal about, but she is use to having people back off when she starts her rants. Well, I am not and she finds that annoying. But i don't care. Not my problem. I don't even have to mention her name for her to start something with me. But let's leave it at that because then she will think I started talking about her again because I can't keep her name out of my mouth.

I have seen you mature a lot in your responses. NOt your ideas. YOu seem as true today as in the beginning, but now instead of getting petty and insulting, you use logic and reasoning. We will never agree on many things, but I have grown to respect your posts as you address the points, and seldom resort to insults these days.

That being said, I understand Charles point, and disagree somewhat. I understand the clique at JU, and as Brad has said in the past, it is not some creation of JU, but a normal manifestation of a community, cyber or physical. But as with all cliques, they may want to believe they are the end all and be all (I say want as I have no idea of their thinking - just written extension of it), but in truth they are just a part of JU. Not JU itself.

Those that are never accepted come looking for acceptance - or a fight. Those that do not care find their own niche. We have several that have never tried to be "in". And they continue to post and garner responses, albeit from only a part of JU, to this day.

I came because it was a fun place to vent, and wax nostalgic. I have been "in" and "out", and found that it really does not matter what I am when it comes to why I joined. So I stay. Not for acceptance from any clique, but because I can continue to do what I came here for.

Just for the record, for newbies and lurkers (since I'm the only Gene who has commented here), the "old cook Gene" referenced isn't me, but "Col. Gene." (Or so I hope! )

Thank you. Go about your business.





(BTW, did you mean "kook" or "crook" or "coot" or...?)

Charles,

You have freedom of speech. Nobody's fighting it. Your freedom of speech, however, is not a freedom to walk into my house, sit down on my couch, and spread your opinions. That is, my right to privacy trumps your freedom of speech.

Nobody's censoring your blog. When they blacklist you, they are simply keeping you out of their living room. If they ignore your blog, they're simply limiting your freedom of speech to your blog.

Just stay true to who you are, and don't sweat the petty things.